22 of August Speechless

Finally everything settle..
I understand tat I really not qualify to hv frens..
Im sorry..
I couldnt fight with the devil in my heart..
I really trying my best...
Bt everytime I will think many n started to cry...
I dono how to change myself to b better..
Isit worth for me to think many..?
I really dono...

Thanks for giving me the chance..
I dono how to repair it like Form 2 we did..
We were very very best best frens b4..
This year definitely like bull-shit....

Duty in blok during recess time..
Think a lot everyday..
If I leave this school...?
Will my life bcum better..?
Wondering wondering wondering..

No one force me..
But Im the one who keep forcing myself..
Until I cry everyday...
I learn to relax..
But when I relax..
I will feel sorry to myself..
I really mad...
I don even noe how to rest well..
My mom allow me to watch tv...
I enjoyed it..
After tat..
I scolded myself for wasting my precious time...

Couldnt do anything..
I really tired..
Being fake really exhausted me..
I really wana change..
I noe wat m i thinking abt..
But I really dono how to fight with the bitch devil in my heart...
SPEECHLESS....TT