:'(

enough.
tats too much things happen on me recently.
enduring and enduring.
im really tired.
and i thought the unlucky things ady stopped,
but today.
another one :'(

my piano,
expected to fail.
my studies,
expected to be very bad.
my life,
getting boring and boring.
my love,
hahahahahaha.
my friendship?
ya, tats funny.

Get to know,
How a ppl will be like in order to accomplish their wishes,
in order to get the power.
and oso in order to get a higher place in certain job.
Extremely sad,
When I got the news.
And,
This is quite scary for me.
:/

and today.
Something happens again.
And,
Had be blamed for being too responsible.
Even being insulted.
My heart is seriously breaking.
I don even think to fight for any higher place for the job I am now.
I did my job.
Tats the only to be concluded.
God,
I did something wrong..?

I'm not the only one who say her.
I'm not the only one who catch her.
And Im not THE ONE who call teacher come.
Why you wanna blame me?
Catching students so rarely.
And this is what I get.
Why?
Why I have to be insulted like this..?

Mummy,
Feel like telling you my feeling now.
This is the first time I dono how to express it out :'(
You will just blame me for taking care too much of unnecessary things.
Blame me that I've been too responsible..
Blame me that being to 8 poh..
Hhahaha,
But I really rarely do that..
I have been insulted like that..
Mummy,
I very very sad :'(
I dono what to do T.T
Really too much of things happen recently.

And,
Next month I will force myself to accept the cruel news..
Which is I failed my piano exam..
And I gotta cry that time again..
This is the saddest moment that I ever had before..
Seriously,
Everything happened in a sudden.
My dear God,
I already dono how to be tough anymore.

Just wonder,
Will my name appears in the toilet?
I noe,
My name will be broken again..
Last year broke once,
I gone through it,
And finally it faded and no one talk about that anymore.
I thank for those who trusts me that time.
But now,
AGAIN.
To you,
Isit feeling good to insult me like this in such a public place?
Yea,
You have the perfect body figure.
Ya,
Im the ugliest one.
No need you to mention about that.
I know myself okay.
And you achieved what you want.
Is to break my name.
And released your anger by hurting me..
Girl,
Congratz..
Im not longer tough now.
:'))

People,
Being a prefect is ain't easy as what you thought.
For you,
We're teachers' dog.
But can't you all stand at our side and think about it?
We endure you,
And even the teachers.
Get scolded by the leaders when we did smth wrong.
If you think at our side.
And we think at our leaders' side.
Isn't it balanced?
Being not responsible,
Being blamed by the teachers..
And make our leaders dissapointed.
Yet,
Being responsible,
This is what I get now.

Students,
People.
Stop blaming the prefects.
If you've done nth wrong,
That's no such things that we're aiming you.
NO SUCH THING AT ALL..
We only catch you,
When you've break the school's rules.
Don tell me,
This is something wrong that we've done.
:/

Exhausted.
Really exhausted.
I can sleep when my body feel tired.
If my spirit feeling tired.
What can I do?
My dear God,
Live again in my heart.
Tell me what should I do.
To overcome every single problems.
Let me be tough.
Like before.
Help me to settle those problems..

Seriously,
Need you now :'(

I cried again.

Daddy,
I'm your daughter.
You all are my family members..
Let me feel warm together with you all..
When I lost friend,
You all are the one who have to support me :/
Please :'(

I dislike to say I hate being at home.
Dislike to hear dad complains and angry everyday.
Dislike to found out that,
I met my dad not enough two hour per day.
I talk with him not enough 1 sentence per day..
How to communicate with you, daddy?
People say I don appreciate wad I have..
I tried,
But I can't..
I might be 10 times more lucky compare to those orphans..
I tried before to think about ur good
But did you?

If I got that ability to support myself,
Everything oso paid on myself..
I know you'll be feeling more relax..
I know I know..
Everything is because of me..
And I oso know,
Im the only burden the you have to bear everyday..
I dislike it too..
What can I do?
And you even ask me to find a work too..

If can,
Exchange ur daughter with others'..
I dono how to try my best to be the best..
Since you're not satisfy with me at all..
Im just a pest in ur heart..
Isn't it?
I don obey you all at all.
The work you asked me to do..
I oways postpone it and finally I done nth.
I asked why don ask sista to do so?
Im not as good as other's daughters.
Sorry for that,
I realize my fault.
I wonder why am I still behaving like that :
Or perhaps,
What you say is right,
Dig a hole,
And sleep inside..
Tats much better..

I choose to understand myself compare to asking you to understand me.
Im now 16 years old.
I use to be tough.
But I hate being tough..
I crack back wad you say everytime.
And you feel like slapping me..
Don't worry,
One day,
I will be slapped.
I let you and I will not avoid..
If that really make you feel better..
And oso I'll leave.

Wad religion am I?
I have no idea.
Half christian?
Buddhist?
Sounds amusing..
Free tingle?
I don think so :/
But still,
Christian is my main choice..
But when will my dad choose to be a christian?
:(

Tears rolling down.
Hav a doubt to God after my piano exam..
I know I will fail it..
So I dono how to pray in order to pass it.
Felt asleep after praying or may b when praying..
The day after,
What have I prayed?
I've forgotten.
The fact is there,
Waiting for me to accept it.. :(

Confident lost.
Yes,
I am extremely tall.
Yes,
Im don have a perfect body figure.
Yes,
Im super skinny.
Yes,
Im not like a girl at all.
Yes,
Im rude.
Yes,
Im fake.
Yes,
yes yes yes..

People say,
Anything happens,
Just hold on your conviction..
Once your strong conviction become weaker..
It cause you to be very in-confident.
This is reasonable..
I got my conviction before?
NO I think. :')


Almost 1 o'clock.
If theres someone's ear that can listen to me.
Yet,
No one.
I dono who to talk with.
Sorry,
Not your fault :')



Continue the smile.
Yes,
I'm always okay (:

:'(

Tears rolling down to my cheek.

What am I crying for?

I hv no any idea.

:(

No no.
Its not worth at all for you to be that good to me..
I'm not qualify to get your good..
You're the best dat I ever met..
But still,
I feel very guilty.
I really not qualify yet to let you be that good to me.

Am just struggling between truth and trust.
Which is the truth?
And no matter its a truth anot,
I will still trust the one.
Without checking out wats really happening..

I just know,
I'm not that good.
Like what you think..
Or,
Some of you know how I am?
May be and may be..
:'(

Sorry for wad I had done..
And another lesson for me,
Just ignore everything next time.

I'm not the good one,
But I'm the best one as your temporary friend..
It's too rare to say.
Every friendship will last forever..
I wish for that but it's impossible..
Now Im ur best friend..
But,
As we're in college..
You'll say ur college frens are the best..
And when u're working,
You'll say ur colleagues are the best..

It's Friendship.

Girl,
You aren't that important..
As what you tot you are.

memories replay.

HI people, am here to replay some memories today ;D
from F1 to F4 which is now,
A very long post.
My all perasan pic..
Remind you to leave if u're super full now..
Or take one plastic bag,
Ready to puke! XD
Nyway,
Tats my memories,
Days which I've grown up
Which I wish to share with you all (:
See the difference on it..
(:

Form one.
The childish look..
And the most original look..
I miss it (:
And this reminded my of my first love..
Tats naive and cute X)

Find out some tat you recognize here XD

we look pure and ORIGINAL.. (:

Bunch of dao gei..
Everyone changes so much here rite? x)

best ji mui last time..
the date..
22 of May 2007.
1 Cempaka (:

whole class involved in choir..
And tats how we looked tat time..
Remember,
Guys were running around when teacher wanna put lipstick on their lips? x)

The girls (:
1 Cempaka sweet memories (:

Choir :)
Some of the guys were SO FREAKING SHORT..
now?
They growed taller and mature..
And.
LENG ZAI :)
Click to zoom in.

yea,
Learn diabolo tat time..
Isit diabolo?
Lol, or tats Chinese yoyo ?XD
Find out which is me XD
The cutest one X)

And this is all when I was in Form 2 :)
No longer the dao gei fringe in Form 1,
They call it as '' san tiao mao '' XD
But still with childish look rite x)

100% original. :D

now i'm even taller ):
And the vest no longer suits me D:

taken on tis year..
look at the previous pic,
check out wats the difference..
especially.
MY HEIGHT.

look at chi hao! XD
Everyone looks cute and ORIGINAL tat time XD
:)

jie muis hold a bday party in school for me last time..
Tat was only the only ONE year which my bday was not in holiday..
Shes my Min li, my jie mui last time..
Poor thing,
She had leave us to another school (:

one of my favourite pic last time. (:

do i look like a malay? XD
a fair malay xP
i did tat for fun seriously.
ahha.


I did love editing picture when I was in Form 2..
But now,
Original might be better (:
And I oso remember,
I'm addicted to L change the word..
The character, L..
aHHA,
Love his pose, and even got a bag who hav a L on it..
why am I so in love with him?
Ahha,
Some of you noe tat.
But its already a past :)

Now,
Form 3..
Says goodBYE to my curly hair..
Straightened my hair tat time :)

seriously disliking my previos hair..
lol.

after rebonding XD

taken on this year's CNY..
don see my face,
do see how long is my previous STRAIGHT hair
i miss it so much.

love tis. :D

straight hair!

long hair!
awww..

Phantom of the Opera..
Qui Han the phantom bside me..
I'm not Raul,
I'm just acting a male dancer..
Do I looked handsome? XD

i looked mature they said.
:P

taken after PMR..
when celebrating my dear's bday XD

Kwok tat Hong..
Hes taller den me last time..
Er,
Although I bend down in this pic..
But now,
It prooved last week.
Im taller NOW.
sad sad case D':

And now,
I'm form 4..
Hair's getting longer and longer..
Until I cut it..
seriously sad case.

[=

i look ugly.
but see how long is my hair! D:

CNY tis year :)
very super absolutely loving my straight hair last time..

mom complains tat my hair was too long,
and my bro even hurt me tat i looks sucks with the long hair.
aww,
so i cut it..
says bye to my straight hair den.
NO,
is BYE to 120+ for the rebonding payment =.=

[=

silly smile

VERY HOT Pic after cutting my hair. =.=

(:

fringe is still long for me..
and silly me,
I cut it..
And it looks sucks having curly fringe =.=
I WANA REBOND AGAIN!

sorry,
am afraid of piano currently D:

oh ya,
can see the scar bside?
havent disappear yet..
cz i lazy to put the ubat on it XD

cute?
sigh.
for a super tall girl,
tats will b sounds nicer if im pretty =.=
no cute pls. D:

taken few days ago (:

PANAS! BEWARE.
lol,
cut tat day, take pic tat day..
tats wad I mean HOT. :)

(:

Future me,
With curly hair may be?
I dono (:
Will decide after graduating (:

back from cousin's wedding..
Thanks cousin for setting up my hair XD

Love tis :)

mature?
or still the dao gei looks? ><

Sorry for frens which I didn't mention here..
You know who you are for me..
Tats too much of pics I have to post..
My life is tat colourful because of you all..
F1 to F3 jiemuis,
Separate and separate..
And now for me,
Tats only Teng. :(
We're not longer close.. D:
But for me,
3 Cempaka was my everything after PMR too (:
S.H.E..
Still same friend-ing..
But if we are not prefect..
We wont be tat fren anymore rite? ):
4 Anggerik,
You will be part of my life until I graduate..
You all are awesome,
Absolutely awesome..
I'm happy being with you all.. (:

Time flew very fast.
We're Form 4 now..
Viewing back the pics,
Almost make me cry..
I missed the memories..
So FREAKING MUCH..
Appreciating everyday,
Before I head to SPM..
And graduate nx year....
(:

I seriously need comment for this post..
Please :D

:'(

People,

Dont let me be alone,
Please.

Make me laugh as crazy as I can.
Make me smile truly from my heart.
I need some laughter in my life recently.

Life will be greater,
If smiling and laughing solves everything.
Hahaha~
Every problems solved..
Tats easy,
Isn't it?

Again,
I dowan to be alone.
I dowan to have the chance to think tat much.
Again,
Make me smile and laugh.
Please.

Yea,
I did stop myself,
From doing the silly thing AGAIN.

:'(

anyone loves to cry?
Ahah,
I do..
I wish to cry as fierce as I can..

Piano ah piano,
Everything is because of you.
You know,
I might fail my exam..
No more confident to hv the PASS..

God,
Can miracles happen?
Please?

Hav a phobia on piano,
Or even on music?
Do I qualify to say I LOVE MUSIC.
Do I?
Do I??

Giving up?
Should I?
Pray more eventhough I noe its impossible to pass?
Should I?
Will it makes me feel more hurt after getting the result?
:'(..
Anyone guides me?
I'm totally lost.

seriously needing a shoulder,
to let me lean on.
I'm TIRED.
VERY, INDEED, EXTREMELY!

bu bah~

HOT!
Taken by webcam (:

Dinner yesterday..
with cousin ;D
There was COLD!
Nyway,
Ignore my sis' dress,
She looked quite nice here (:

(:
My look for cousin's dinner..
I curled my hair!
Ignore the fringe, I DISLIKE too =.=
Aheh, wearing the dress that my buddies bought for me too ;D




the one who should leave will definitely leave,
the one who should come might come too..
the one who should meet will also appears in the right time.


该走的人终究会走，
该来的人也一定会来，
该见的人只要时间一到就会相见．．(:

what for to FIND?
just like what i oways say,
LET GOD ARRANGE EVERYTHING.
(:

i promise myself i wont do it again,
But i ended up everything with
'' just one time pls. ''
Seriously FAIL.

Girl,
You're a girl..
When will you really understand this? :(

hmm.

well,
I choose to ignore..
Dowan bother anymore..
Its just a whatever..
YOU KNOW?
WHATEVER

You might angry I did so,
But if you're me..
Will you do like wad I did?
Hmm.

new song

I love the new song of my BLOG!

Song from the drama,

Shiny Inheritance!

Song's name,

Thinking of noona..

What is noona means?

Hahaha,

Yeah,

Its sista, jie jie (:


Searching this song for so long,

Finally I found it..

Share with you all ;D

grade 8 piano exam!

Today is like Friday to me..
Hahax,
Tomorrow not going school.
Am sitting for piano exam!

I know I'm not alone now,
Many ppl wish me luck..
And people pray for me too..
I cant wait to be a real CHRISTIAN now
With God,
Everything will be fine (:

3.40 pm !
Don take a nap at this time..
Those Christian buddies,
Do pray for me ;D
I wanna pass my grade 8 exam..
Pray tat I can play well,
I wont be too nervous.
And oso pray tat I will be blessed,
In a nut shell,
PRAY THAT I PASS MY EXAM..

Its still a short while from my FREEDOM.. :)
Karate Kid, Eclipse..
WAIT ME..
MUhahahehhehe ~
Just hope everything will be fine tomorrow..
Hope those mistakes will disappear tomorrow..
MIRACLES HAPPEN..
And those quesitons tat the examiner asks,
I will be able to answer correctly with my confident..

God bless me,
Thanks everyone for wishing me..
I will try my very best..
Please,
PRAY FOR ME TOO..
;)